Thieves Annonymous

Hello, my name is Blueberry and I am a thief. I am sitting in jail now awaiting the judge to forgive me and end my punishment. This is how my story goes, I am known in my hood for stealing my boss' chapstick and underwear (don't tell anyone that I told this). My boss came home the other day, changed, and left her jeans in the dirty clothes pile. Well, I smelled something really good in the pocket, so I took them to the couch in the livingroom (this is the assigned place for us thieves to divvy up the loot) and started to work. Well, I couldn't get it to come out of the pocket, so I had to turn them inside out and chew a hole in the bottom of the pocket to get it loose. It was one of my favorites, strawberry chapstick, yummy!! I proceeded to eat it all, except a few small pieces of plastic. My boss was concerned this morning because I had pink on my foot (stupid me, that is how she figured out who did it) and she thought I was chewing on my own foot, yeah right!! I guess she found the hole in her pocket tonight when she came home from work and what I forgot to hide of the plastic pieces. Now I sit in my cell counting the minutes until the judge realizes that it was all my bosses fault. I am bored and all I have is a metal bowl to bang on the door. None of my gang will help, they are too scared of the boss.